Intro:
Amateur porn can be enjoyable, sure, but can it really compare to the work of seasoned vets with hours upon hours of on-screen fuck-time under their non-existent belts? I highly doubt it. Look at it this way – would you feel safer and more likely to enjoy beating off to a compilation of Jenna Jameson’s greatest cumshot clips or a grainy, poorly shot cell-phone video of some obese broad sucking her husband’s embarrassingly diminutive wiener like she’s fishing for the last spoonful of peanut butter? The former is obviously the wiser choice (although the latter can, on occasion, be fun, too). Sitting fairly comfortably and confidently in the Professionals corner of this hypothetical fight ring sits Porn Pros, a 28-site network that claims to be “Rated Best HD Porn Site” and promises future members 1080p videos, over 5000 exclusive scenes, two updates every day, and some of the most outlandish, cartoonish adult entertainment. At $24.94 a month, membership isn’t all that expensive, but now it’s even less so thanks to Mr. Pink’s discounted price of $17.95. Doesn’t this all seem too good to be true? If our past reviews of Porn Pros’ sites have proven anything, it’s that there’s always a few surprises in store, so let’s unwrap ‘em and find out what the deal be.

Pros:
- 28 sites! That’s a whole lot of fuckin’, folks; over 1,300 scenes of it, in fact. Covering all bases - monster cocks, huge tits, spunky teen sluts, humiliating punishment sex, sex-oriented game shows, older women, gangbangs, and gymnastic porn only scrape the surface – this reviewer struggles to come up with a niche untouched by Porn Pros in some way. (Ok, so they’re not about to put up softcore scenes with Vaseline-lense, cheesy music, and light, lingering kisses in front of an open fire, but that’s about it.)

- Video content now comes in High Definition resolutions – WMVs and MPGs reach 1248x700 pixels – and all downloadable and streaming selections look very nice. The colors are strong and cartoonish, amplifying the truly absurd nature of some of these sites’ distinct brand of porn.

- Photos and screenshots (both are provided with each scene) also appear strong and clear, can be downloaded as zip archives, viewed via the automated slideshow, and reach resolutions of 850x850 pixels. While the screenshots don’t offer anything you won’t find in the video portions of a scene, the photo galleries give you a good, long look at the models and the range of depraved and delicious things they get up to.

- Updates arrive weekly on many Porn Pros sites. Although this is definitely an area that needs work (see Cons), there is something new added to the network almost every day, which is great to see and will keep your and your palm pretty busy.

Cons:
- As stated above, the updates do need some work. Why? Well, a number of the sites have stopped adding content weekly in favor of bi-weekly updates, while some other sites have stopped updating entirely and seem to be festering in a stagnant pool of their own bodily emissions… Well, they would if they had bodies, I guess.

- The servers employed by the Porn Pros are far from professional quality. Transfers stop and drop like they’re part of a fire awareness presentation and it’s exceedingly rare to find yourself downloading a video (which, in HD formats, can easily be upwards of 600 MB) at a speed anywhere close to approaching acceptable rates.

- Porn Pros seems to be employing some less than calming business practices in order to rake in a few more bucks. 18 Years Old has been online for quite some time, but has just been joined by Hacked 18, a site with a tour page that presents identical content as 18 Years Old. There is, of course, no Hacked 18 included in the Porn Pros network. Not only this, but older content has been moved from Cumshot Surprise to the brand new LOL Cumshots, marking another attempt by the supposed Pros to deceive consumers.

Conclusion:
Oh, how I long for the golden days of Porn Pros when the cartoonish cavalcade of downright ridiculous adult entertainment flowed freely from the stable servers to my waiting hard drive. I’d start up a scene and be thrilled by the lack of boring intro drivel that required immediate and unrestrained fast-forwarding. I’d watch the gorgeous model become entangled in a hijinks-filled situation and slowly figuring out that she could untangle herself by employing the very gifts god (or her mama) gave her. Make no mistake, the content hosted by Porn Pros is still thoroughly entertaining, arousing, and genuinely original, but the manner in which this company seems to conduct business doesn’t really seem to make a lot of sense. Are they merely trying out new advertising tools? Are they intentionally trying to rip off new customers with fake and duplicate websites? Either way, it’s unsettling… just like O.G. Mudbone’s incredible wang.